Friday, September 2, 2011

Bald bears

So I've been hearing that various hair related products can make certain people go bald. Hair straighteners and hair dyes mainly. I don't know if it's true, but I don't see why people would take that risk. Clearly they are working on their hair because they value hair that looks nice, but people that care how their hair looks are the ones it would be worse for in going bald. If I went bald I don't think I'd care that much. As long as I've got my beard I'm happy. Happy beard day by the way. Actually I probably would go the comb over and it would look terrible. I don't really care about that at this point though. I might when it happens. It will happen though. My ancestors are balding, on both sides of my family. I would like to do that rad thing with my hair that the Japanese men often do if I go bald. It might be called a top knot, I'm not sure. I'm definitely going to curse people who call me bald in the name of the LORD. Then two female bears will come out of the woods and tear up forty-two lads of their number. It would be especially impressive considering the lack of bears in Australia. Maybe koala bears... I like how many people like to say "They're not really bears!" I reckon they just crack down on the koala because Australia already has more than its quota of dangerous animals, and bears are dangerous so Australia can't have them. All our animals are small anyway. All the deadly ones are things like spiders and snakes. I want a big bear. Or a tiny monkey. Can someone please buy me a pygmy marmoset? Also a teacup pig so I can have my monkey ride a pig. It'd be so cool.